In honor of little black girls

From Mary Hoffman's book Amazing Grace

"That nappy hair."

"That dark skin."

"That big nose."

"Those big lips."

If you are a black kid, you've probably heard hurtful words like these.

I remember being 10 years old. It was an odd time. I was still a kid, but I was in the double digit years for the first time. I was the plump, too-tall-to-be-10 kid. I loved reading and excelled in school, but I didn't feel like I really fit in. I wanted to be a Latina with dark, straight hair. Why a Latina? Well, I couldn't be white and didn't want to be white. Mind you, I didn't know any Latinos, but I was in Spanish club in about 3rd grade, and I had a Cabbage Patch doll that I thought was black due to her caramel-colored skin that matched mine...but when I popped in the CD-rom to register my doll, I found out she was a Latina. Welppp, that's what I wanted to be, too, because I wanted to experience what it would be like to not be black.

As a concerned auntie, I've been thinking about how to encourage my oldest niece and promote healthy self-esteem. For Harriet compiled an amazing list of 25 Empowering Books for Little Black Girls. While she is 10 years old and in this "tween" stage, I still think that several of these books will be helpful in opening her eyes to see herself as a person with a rich heritage and limitless possibilities.

As I got older, I began to understand that God created me and that everything that He created in the first 6 days of Earth, He declared "good". I understood that God loves me so much, that He wants me to not have to be separated from Him. He took measures to ensure that I have an opportunity to experience and know Him and His love, abundance, hope, mercy, forgiveness, and grace. What a good God! I want my niece to understand these things now, in her younger years, so that she can spread God's story to others so that they, and she, might experience the same. And change the narrative to...

"That lovely tightly coiled hair. Look at bounce!"

"That beautiful mocha colored skin. Sweet!"

"That strong nose."

"Those delightful lips that only people from a rich continent and history of being survivors."

My love life

Scooped from: Fun Box

Relationships are such a hot topic. Even in the church. I hold the opinion that we shouldn't talk about others' relationships in an effort to gossip. We should talk about our own relationships in an effort to share experiences and wisdom and to encourage one another. Doesn't always happen that way now does it?

A dear, old (literally, 70+) friend of mine would often ask about my "love life" whenever I called her. She was so interested in what type of man I would choose. She viewed me as her granddaughter and had such a different perspective on things than I did. On that note, speaking of my love life, some interesting things have happened.

I have recently had an experience in which God has blessed me to be in a great friendship with a man who sincerely loves Him and is so sweet. The Lord has even used this brother to challenge me in my relationship with the Lord - specifically when it comes to my prayer life and sharing the Gospel. I am so thankful to the Lord for this friendship.

I have no idea where it will go, but for now, I am thankful. I haven't always been so patient when it comes to a relationship, so it is evident that the Lord is doin' a WORK in my heart. My plan for my "love life" consists of showing others the love of Christ so that they see Him and praying fervently for others. My love life is so much more than a relationship with a man of clay. It is about the way I love others.

Ponder that...

Reflection on marriage

blog.lib.umn.edu

I found this in my journal from last year around this time. I was really, seriously thinking about, praying about, and reading about marriage.  Here are some questions that I asked myself, and other things I thought about. So for you other single ladies (and especially those who've never been in a serious relationship like me)...be encouraged! :)

Am I a woman of prayer? Am I a woman that truly LOVES the Lord and shows that by the way I live (selflessly, boldly for Christ)?

Do I trust God above all others?

How do I:

steward my time?  My money?  My gifts from God (i.e. singing, teaching, creative caring ideas)?

Does my living space show that I: cook? Clean? Take care of my body?

How do I treat the men in my life? My dad? Brother? Male friends?

Do I always speak my mind or do I hold my peace and choose my words carefully? 

Am I compassionate towards others? How's my serve?

Am I patient? Am I a woman of grace?

Am I able to take criticism? Especially when it's constructive?

Waiting and Dating Review

familychristian.com

Waiting and Dating by Myles Munroe.  HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.  

              This book was REALLY helpful to me.  Take a look at the chapter titles:  Preparing to Date, Friendship-Building:  The Purpose of Dating, Myths of Mate-Finding, Discerning the Right Life Partner, Engagement:  Preparing to Marry, and Engagement:  Redeeming the Time. 

                I wasn’t expecting the book to give so much information about working on yourself and growing in your relationship with God BEFORE you even start dating.  The things Mr. Munroe wrote were very encouraging and helped me see dating in a different light.  I was expecting the book to just give tips on dating and praying about dating, etc. but he REALLY does a great job laying down some Biblical principles regarding relationships and EVEN spends time in one of the engagement chapters teaching about engagement stories from the Old Testament. 

Book Review: I Kissed Dating Goodbye

goodreads.com

Ok.  Here we go with the relationship book reviews! This book sparked a movement...from what I hear.  The title was catchy enough.  The book was published in 1997 so I have images in my mind of people in their teens and early 20s with hairdos and clothes from All That and Saved By the Bell walking around saying "no" to dating.  This book has also received a lot of bad press.  Here's what I thought of the book I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris.